Dukakis Hugging Moon Maiden - invasion [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Chad

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invasion [Apr. 29th, 2008|01:29 pm]
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I don't have anything against spiders, per se. My true enemy from the realm of very small animals is and always will be bees and wasps and hornets. I honestly have a bona fide phobia, even of humanity's alleged friend, the honeybee. As for spiders...well, at least they can't fly and don't attack en masse. And the fourteen-year old in me simply loves the concept of an eight-legged, eight-eyed, trap-setting vampire.

Unfortunately, as in the classic film Arachnophobia, my home is being invaded. Eleven large, fat, healthy spiders have already shown up while a downstairs sink was turned into a nursery for twenty or so broodlings. Worse of all, these are a special kind of spider native just to my part of the United States, the brown recluse, who like to set up homes in people's closets, nightstands, and even their clothes and shoes, whose bites you probably won't notice until the nausea and muscle and joint pain sets in, and, if you're really, really lucky, their venom will cause the tissue around the bite wound to literally rot.

So, needless to say, despite my lack of a grudge against the spider species, I've been as free with the bug spray as an '80s action star was with bullets. In fact, I think after writing this, I'll go another round. I'll kill myself with my own reckless use of toxic materials before I let myself be wounded by freeloading spiders.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: [info]audacian
2008-04-29 05:48 pm (UTC)

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Ugh. We bought some industrial strength wasp killer and have been going to town. It's dangerous to do - one false hit and you've done nothing to piss them off. :[

I can't stand spiders. They're starting to come in by us, too. I can handle the little ones for the most part, but the fat ones? No, dear god no.
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-04-29 05:59 pm (UTC)

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The fat, big ones do freak me out a little bit, because despite their size they can move like the wind...an ugly, hairy, and potentially poisonous wind.
[User Picture]From: [info]biquet
2008-04-29 05:57 pm (UTC)

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Oh, hell no. Spiders give me the willies. The only thing worse than spiders is the hideous camel cricket, which looks like a big-ass spider but jumps like a cockroach. They infested the basement of one of my college apartments. /shudder

So, good luck with that shit.
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-04-29 06:02 pm (UTC)

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Good God, I've never even heard of the camel cricket. That sounds like a fun one.

The spiders actually wouldn't trouble me so much, but the combination of them being quasi-poisonous and their habit of hiding in shoes - I mean, for chrissake, shoes - is like a real-life horror movie.
[User Picture]From: [info]kadath
2008-04-29 06:04 pm (UTC)

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Killing stuff with necrotizing venom is sane.
[User Picture]From: [info]professormortis
2008-04-29 06:09 pm (UTC)

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Exactly. Ordinarily I like spiders, but if I had a Black Widow infestation (I believe the only poisonous spiders around me) I'd have to tac nuke it too.
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-04-29 06:15 pm (UTC)

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We have black widows too, although for whatever reason they're usually not a problem unless you go into forests or woodpiles.

If there were only some way to get a pack of black widows to come in and fight the recluses to death...I'd be living a Sci-Fi original!
[User Picture]From: [info]professormortis
2008-04-29 06:20 pm (UTC)

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If they do, please film it. Or write a script based on your venom-induced hallucinations.

Just be sure that you aren't actually in some hellish backwoods giallo film-wasn't there one with a killer that attack via tarantulas?
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-04-29 06:25 pm (UTC)

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Hmm, that movie sounds familiar. I think it was even directed by a fairly big name, but I might be way off.

The brown recluse really does seem like a concept out of the mind of an Italian horror director. They hide where you least suspect it *and* their venom can cause big, bloody holes in your body.
[User Picture]From: [info]professormortis
2008-04-29 06:29 pm (UTC)

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Yeah, your description of their venom effect sounds like the spider attack in The Beyond.

[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-04-29 06:12 pm (UTC)

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Hell yeah. There'll be no extension of my usual courtesy of "Find a way to move them outside" here.

[User Picture]From: [info]anne_jumps
2008-04-29 05:58 pm (UTC)

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Oh shit, oh shit.
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-04-29 06:09 pm (UTC)

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It didn't help that my mom sent me this e-mail forward warning about brown recluses, with graphic pictures of the sort of deep, gaping wounds people who have been bitten get.
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-04-29 06:07 pm (UTC)

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Haha! It's good to see, in one small respect, I'm more of a badass than prison inmates.

'course, I probably would have flipped out over the spider-nest, if getting rid of it and its inhabitants wasn't just a matter of turning the sink on full-blast.
[User Picture]From: [info]hotcoffeems
2008-04-29 06:15 pm (UTC)

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Yeah, whoah.

I'm a live and let live kind of person, but I draw the line at venomous species in my home, expecially if they're the kind who are *stealthy* (this is why the 5-foot cottonmouth undulating across my yard inspired only the briefest of freakouts: it's not like she's going to hide in my shoes.)

Have you considered calling an exterminator? I donm't know if they usually handle such beasties, but if there's a few...
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-04-29 06:22 pm (UTC)

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I've thought about it. I'm in a really bad financial crunch right now, though, so it would have to be a last resort. The last spider I saw *was* killed by the bug spray, so hopefully my efforts are working (I'm just glad I got that nest before the hatchlings were ready to move on, or else I really would be fucked).

The scariest thing is that, from what I read, you usually don't even know you've been bitten until the symptoms set in. At least with black widows you sure as hell *know* when you've been bitten.



[User Picture]From: [info]sub_musashi
2008-04-29 06:23 pm (UTC)

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Yep, I didn't realize I had been bit until I started having chills from the poison.
[User Picture]From: [info]saoba
2008-04-29 07:18 pm (UTC)

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Ayup.

We were loading various cars after a camping weekend and I said mildly, 'Hey *Friend's Name* you have a really big bruise on the back of your leg, what's up with that?'.

Friend didn't know what was up with that. Didn't recall doing anything that would have caused a palm sized bruise. Also admitted to having woken up feeling dizzy and sick to her stomach.

Another member of our camping party was an EMT. Upshot was we drove our friend (protesting weakly) to a nearby doc inna box clinic. Recluse bite. Three days in the hospital.

Ugh. Damn things give me the willies.
[User Picture]From: [info]sub_musashi
2008-04-29 06:22 pm (UTC)

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We hates the spiderses! Were you on my friendslist when I almost lost my leg to a spider bite?
[User Picture]From: [info]j_lovescoffee
2008-04-29 06:55 pm (UTC)

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That probably did not help set minds to ease... (but is true. it was pretty crazy.)
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-04-29 07:01 pm (UTC)

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No! Was it a brown recluse?
[User Picture]From: [info]sub_musashi
2008-04-29 07:28 pm (UTC)

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No, but we thought it was at the time. The full tale is here: http://sub-musashi.livejournal.com/50910.html

J-Lo is right, though - this story probably won't help your anxiety any.
[User Picture]From: [info]fainic_thu_fein
2008-04-29 06:57 pm (UTC)

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There was a minor brown recluse infestation in my house in West Virginia. I've a debilitating phobia of spiders generally, even if I know they're harmless, so learning of the recluse's necrotizing venom caused me to more or less lose my mind. Finding them was truly horrifying, but the paranoia of knowing they were out there somewhere was even worse. I was constantly checking shoes and shaking out clothes and bedding,

*shudders*
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-05-01 06:06 pm (UTC)

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Fortunately I'm stressed out over the fact that a computer repairperson is apparently holding my laptop hostage, so the insects are just a distraction for now. Yay for a sucky life!
[User Picture]From: [info]improperbrahmin
2008-04-29 09:01 pm (UTC)

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I thought you lived outside the green blob of poisonous death?
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-05-01 06:10 pm (UTC)

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Huh, I do, so either that map is wrong or my home happened to be the sight of their family vacation.
[User Picture]From: [info]tigerbeard
2008-04-30 02:11 am (UTC)

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We get Red Backs and White Tips here - too far south for Funnel Webs thank god - so anything entering our house with more than two legs gets either flattened or gassed.
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-05-01 06:22 pm (UTC)

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No offense, but this is why I will never go to Australia (that and the eight-hour plane ride).
[User Picture]From: [info]tigerbeard
2008-05-02 11:41 am (UTC)

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I'd better keep quiet about this little bugger then
[User Picture]From: [info]katura
2008-04-30 11:29 am (UTC)

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Ack! I feel like I'm in the land of giant spiders here, but THAT would freak me the fuck out.
[User Picture]From: [info]drownedinink
2008-05-01 06:28 pm (UTC)

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It's kind of depressing, because I always said that there are two benefits to living in Virginia: the weather is relatively mild (we do get both hurricanes and blizzards, but usually neither are nearly as bad as they get further south or north); and the wildlife isn't all that dangerous. I guess the second has been disproven!